For the past one year have I been captured by a momentary feeling at the moment I separate with my girl. No any other time do I feel with my heart the four words in Chinese "刹那凄然”. Is it because of human nature, that when we depart with someone dear we feel the bone-deep sadness? From the bottom of my heart I was not willing to let her looked after by anyone else, not with a good grace. However, I have to work, and besides, it would be negative if I in person take care of her all day and all night, both to me and my girl. It was a dilemmatic choice. On one hand, I am an individual, who hopes for a private life; on the other hand, I am a mother with depths of love for her child. Life is disaperate if you suffer but can't do anything to make a change. And you just hold that the odds are for us. But you always feel the reality is against you....That is the feeling when I let my child looked after by others. Is it because I am too sensitive to make a right judgement? Nowhere to get the answer...
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